Day 36 | Troi Buchanan

Psalm 62

5 For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him. 6 He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken. 7 On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God.

The central theme of Psalm 62 is waiting on the Lord. I’ve heard this phrase my entire life, and to be honest up until recently I’ve had no idea what it means. When I think about waiting on the Lord I imagine just sitting around depressed, hoping that God will show up like a knight in shining armor and deliver me from whatever I’m struggling with. I’m a 1 on the Enneagram and a “DO” on the crap model, so sitting around waiting to be rescued feels like hell to me. But I think that we’ve misunderstood what waiting looks like in our lives.

An accurate depiction of me waiting. Please excuse every bit of my 2007 fashion sensibility.

The directors are currently reading a book called Red Moon Rising, and in one section of the book the author explains “The Cycle Of Blessing.” Here’s the idea; we are always in one of four stages in our relationship with God.

1. Numb
2. Wrestling
3. Waiting
4. Blessing*

So when we start the cycle we feel lonely, lost, maybe even nothing at all. Then slowly our heart starts to become agitated. We’re uncomfortable, upset, irritated, maybe even sad, but we can’t figure out why. We’re wrestling with ourselves trying to put language to what ails us. Then over time we receive clarity, we’re able to express what’s going on inside of us, and we move on to the next phase, waiting. Check out this quote from the author.

“You no longer wrestle with yourself, but like Jacob, [you wrestle] with God. This is the time of waiting and watching-”

**The idea behind godly waiting is not passive waiting, but rather active waiting.

Psalm 62

11 Once God has spoken; twice have I heard this: that power belongs to God, 12 and that to you, O Lord, belongs steadfast love. For you will render to a man according to his work.

The power to move our hearts is ultimately in God’s hands, but we are supposed to play an active part in the process. Spending time in prayer, seeking out wisdom from others, engaging in worship, reading books, seeking counseling or therapy, knocking on different doors and seeking opportunity, these are all ways of actively waiting. We’re joining God in the process.

So today, whether you are numb, wrestling, waiting, or in the thick of God’s presence and blessing, know that God is on your side, and that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

*Now to be honest, I have a weird relationship with the word “blessing”, personally it has some baggage. But for the most part you can replace that word with whatever word you’re comfortable with, the idea is that in that phase God is present in your life.

** This is a wild story in Genesis 32:22-32 if you want to check it out.